Spread the love

A person’s garden, lawn, and yard are their pride and joy. No matter how horrendously bizarre, ugly, eccentric, and eldritch it might look! There’s a certain beauty in ugliness and we shouldn’t be shy about sharing it with the world. And if our neighbors get mad, well that’s when you show them this captivating Instagram account that features weird and ugly gardens in all their decadent glory.

Created by English and history teacher James Hull and landscape architect Bede Brennan, the Instagram project has already amassed a whopping 124k followers and continues to grow. Much like the weeds digging their roots ever-deeper in some of these lawns.

Have a look at the very worst gardens below, upvote the ones that are so bad they’re starting to seem quite nice, and let us know which of these dystopian nightmares you loved hating the most. Just take care not to get lost in the weeds, otherwise, we’ll have to send out a Panda search party. We just hope the garden gnomes won’t notice us… golly that’s a lot of gnomes!

More info: Instagram | Book

#1 Hidden Agenda

Image credits: s**tgardens

#2 2021 Emerging

Image credits: s**tgardens

#3 Let There Be Light

Image credits: s**tgardens

The entire project is meant as a celebration, not a condemnation of “horticulturally challenged yards and gardens” from all over the globe. And while this ugliness certainly is appealing (if you gaze long enough into the abyss, it’ll start gazing into you as well), it’s also bound to make at least some of you Pandas want to get your lawnmower and pressure washer.

Some of the garden design choices are truly baffling. There’s an overwhelming number of decorations that shouldn’t ever have left the shop (or factory if we’re truly honest) to begin with.

#4 When You Just Can’t Seem To Get Into The Swing Of Things

Image credits: s**tgardens

#5 “For He Died To Save Our Topiaries”

Image credits: s**tgardens

#6 If You Like Piña Coladas, And Getting Caught In The Rain

Image credits: s**tgardens

Meanwhile, the landscaping in some yards looks like something you’d get when you cross M.C. Escher’s work with Salvador Dalí’s paintings. Non-Euclidian geometry and bizarre forms seem to be the name of the game. And this loving madness seems contagious.

The founders of the project, James and Bede, spoke to Land8 about their Instagram page. They noted that the account is as much about endearingly weird gardens as it is about truly horrible yards.

“Neglected expanses of concrete, weed harboring swamps, or lifeless and loveless colored gravel,” they gave some examples. “These are not our main focus, though they are sometimes worth a laugh.”

#7 Bring Greenery Back Into Our Urban Parks

Image credits: s**tgardens

#8 Femme Fatale: The Postman’s Affliction

Image credits: s**tgardens

#9 Dentist And Gardener

Image credits: s**tgardens

Some of the things that these badly-designed and kept gardens might have include “grand statues, mid-century breeze blocks, and unprofessionally restored historic items.” According to the founders, nobody on Planet Earth is exempt from having weird and bad gardens. However, some hotspots include Melbourne which is a “Mecca for this aesthetics,” as well as the United States. Especially the central states.

#10 Shrine To The Panic Buy

Image credits: s**tgardens

#11 Mood

Image credits: s**tgardens

#12 To Pass Our Driveway You Must Answer Me These Questions Three…

Image credits: s**tgardens

“I think we felt that suburban Melbourne and its gardeners had a very unique approach. We’re not doctorates or anything. We’ve studied a little bit of history, a little bit of philosophy, this and that. There’s a sense of homage to a lot of ancient Greek and Roman cultures, and in front yards it is often quite dramatic. There’s just these interesting narratives that spring up from the gardens,” James told New York Magazine.

#13 Limits To Growth

Image credits: s**tgardens

#14 The Mondrian Of Municipality

Image credits: s**tgardens

#15 When Baby-Boomers Try To Use Email

Image credits: s**tgardens

He reiterated that the goal of the account isn’t to make fun of anyone but to celebrate how much these gardens “enrich and liven up our suburbs.” The goal? To help fight boredom. Imagine how boring life would be if you didn’t have some contrast and clashing aesthetics once in a while. Peaceful suburban life? Yuck! Give us weirdness and ugliness. And don’t forget the garden gnomes!